Words that Build Up

Friday meant ADM Prayer Meet again with Davis (my Year 1 Foundation Drawing tutor) and my brothers- and sisters-in-Christ in ADM (mostly Animation students) and to be honest, I felt pretty sluggish going as I had been feeling pretty sleepy the entire day and was trying very hard figuring out why... (ended up practising the guitar for 4 hours in the day when I had initially planned to finish some Typography II homework to send to print in town, woops...)

But thank God, for the meet ended up being really amazing and refreshing. God always shows up despite my moods and circumstances. And I am ever always so thankful for that.

Davis led this week's meet, and went through 1 Corinthians 1:1-9 with us.

1 Paul, called to be an apostle of Christ Jesus by the will of God, and our brother Sosthenes, 2 To the church of God in Corinth, to those sanctified in Christ Jesus and called to be his holy people, together with all those everywhere who call on the name of our Lord Jesus Christ—their Lord and ours: 3 Grace and peace to you from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ. 

4 I always thank my God for you because of his grace given you in Christ Jesus. 5 For in him you have been enriched in every way—with all kinds of speech and with all knowledge — 6 God thus confirming our testimony about Christ among you. 7 Therefore you do not lack any spiritual gift as you eagerly wait for our Lord Jesus Christ to be revealed. 8 He will also keep you firm to the end, so that you will be blameless on the day of our Lord Jesus Christ. 9 God is faithful, who has called you into fellowship with his Son, Jesus Christ our Lord.

The topic was on 'Blessings', and Davis shared about how blessings do not mean merely good things, but it also means 'God's will', and that often includes things that we might not like or want as well, but which God knows we need in order to truly grow to be more like Him.

The prayer meet happened beyond my expectations as it ended up having some sort of unplanned affirmation by Davis to a couple of us after we shared what are some of God's blessings to us in our lives. 

Contemplated for quite some time before I decided to share in brief about being thankful to God for His blessings which come in the form of tests and hardships, stating the example of the unnatural demise of my earthly father 8 years ago, which forced me to question Him. Though it was a difficult time to tide through, it was definitely the most defining chapter in my life where I was (then unknowingly) moulded and shaped by God in character. If not for this experience, I would never have learnt to truly empathise for people, and would never be as appreciative and grateful for people around me as well as the Father I have in heaven and the identity He secures me, right now.

Was surprised when Davis decided to take this time to talk about how I was back in our Foundation Drawing I & II classes in 2013 and 2014. He said (in paraphrase), "Within the first two weeks I met Amanda in class I could tell she was a Christian, because the Spirit was so evident in her". 

He also added that my presence was significant in the class as he could see how everyone saw this person with respect, such as when she speaks in class, the class will go silent. He said that this person had a very important role in the class which she might not have known, as whenever he gives her feedback on the drawings, he would say things that will draw her back to God, and he was actually hoping that through saying these words out loud in class, the classmates sitting around her might hear them, in hope that seeds will be sown in their hearts as well. 

One such memorable advice he gave me which he also quoted was, "Let go, and let God take control. Let God do the drawing for you." It was a trying period of artistic growth at that time as I was struggling with learning to be free in my drawing and not trying to control them too much, but instead to let God take the wheel even in my art making. It was a God-given piece of advice which seriously spoke straight into my heart and since then I had been really inspired to want to be freer, in making art, and also involving Jesus in the process. 

Davis said that after he told me that advice, he noticed that I had changed in the way I created my art, and could see that I was becoming freer in drawing. He was encouraged by the growth and change that I underwent, to grow himself as well, as an artist who is creating for God.

These words were completely new and most unexpected to me. This was because I had always subconsciously thought that I didn't have a substantial presence in my Year 1 class back then.. perhaps I was too busy being crippled by thoughts of self-doubt and uncertainty in myself to realise how much God had been yearning to use me to shine His light for Him.

Davis' affirmation was extremely encouraging for me as God was clearly speaking to me (through him), that He will equip me wherever He sends me to, and I need not (and cannot!) belittle what I have to offer to people.

It was extremely humbling to be able to receive these words from the tutor I looked up to the most, the one whom I had been immensely encouraged by time and again to live my life and identity as a child of God out wherever I go in ADM. And also to know that I could even encourage him hahahaha...

Was reminded from this session about that advice Davis gave me 2-3 semesters back and it got me to reflect.

Am I still letting God take charge in my graphic designing process now?
Am I letting Him take the wheel in the entire process?
Or am I too busy entertaining my own thoughts of worries and anxieties to even realise that He has been always desiring to do His work in my work?

Father God, thank You for speaking encouragement and love to me through this precious community of bros and sisters in ADM tonight. Thank You for showing Your Spirit and Your presence to people around me through me, even though I fail to recognise it ( :'( ). Lord I ask that not my presence be made, but Yours, as You lead me to interact with whoever I meet in school. God I command for more of Your presence, Your promptings, Your guidance, each and every moment in my days, this semester. Help me also, to be faithful and obedient in following through as I hear Your words. Help me to do my graphic design work with MUCH of Your joy, this semester - I know I can never do these without Your strength and grace. Help me to be able to serve you in my homework with so much joy that it spills over to my peers, and they will also receive Your joy and love through Your vessel here, and know that there is something, Someone, greater working within me.

Help me to learn to be humble and quick to release words of love and affirmation to people around me too, knowing that You have given us the power to speak to build lives up even more strongly for Your kingdom.

Thank You Daddy!

In Jesus' name I pray, amen.